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The following is a series of questions and answers that address
my privacy policy. You should come away from reading this document
with a very clear, precise, and calming feeling about how I treat
your data. Your private, secure, and sensitive information.
You know. Personal.
I use the web like many of you, so I am just as concerned about how my
information is handled as you are. But, you don't know me. You don't
know if you can trust me. You don't know if I will be gentle with your
data, or toss it around the net for all to see like hanging laundry
on my balcony. That's why you're reading this.
To give you a little more comfort and understanding about what exactly
happens if and when I collect information from you, read on:
 Why did the chicken cross the road?
 That's got nothing to do with your privacy policy.
Just answer the question.
Oh, alright. sigh. "I don't know: why did the chicken cross the road?"
To avoid getting spam in his mailbox.
That's incredibly stupid.
No kidding. We're talking about chickens.
What does this have to do with your privacy statement?
Because chickens hate spam, too, and it's really stupid to cross
the road if you're a chicken. And if you're a human, it won't stop spam.
And your point is?
People are so paranoid about their email's getting to spammers,
that they overreact to pretty much anything, so I'm just trying to
lighten things up here.
Can you blame us? We hate spam!
Of course you do. We all hate spam. But here's what people
don't really understand: Spammers crawl the net looking for email
addresses all day, from online newsgroups to discussion boards to
chat sessions and email address lists and phone books.
They collect millions upon millions of names, and then they sell those
lists to other people who send spam. These mailing lists of millions
of addresses are bought and sold for as little as $50.
Fifty dollars!? Why so little?
Because it's extremely simple to crawl the net looking for email
addresses, it's automated, and sales are simple.
Aha!! See? You could sell your mailing list and make money, right?
Not exactly. I have about 10,000 names on my mailing list. And given the
fifty bucks someone can pay to get millions of email addresses, my list is
of no value to anyone. So, I couldn't sell names if I wanted to.
Ok. So I'm no longer worried about you having my email address.
But I have another issue: will you ask for other personal information
like my mailing address, phone number, or credit card information?
If you buy something, yes. I will need to send it to you.
That makes sense. But what about security?
I use the same secure internet technologies everyone else uses,
including your bank and all retailers. Everyone on the net uses
the same thing. As for your credit card number, I don't keep it after
the transaction takes place. I don't have it anymore. I don't want it. I
have no need for it, and don't want you or me to worry about it.
Super. I'm satisfied. One more thing: If I'm asking all the questions,
why am I the "Answer" guy, and not the "Question" guy?
Should we switch?
Lemme think about it.
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